E.K. NATION

We're pressed for time. Smooth, go!

Smooth: I didn't like either song by Jason Castro that much. He did OK, better than some of the last few weeks. It was kind of cruise-shippy, partially a product of the theme I think.

E.K.: We're seeing the same performance from him every night. And it was doubly boring, because of the two songs.

Smooth: I thought David Cook was the best of the night, although that might not be saying that much. He really did make his songs sound contemporary, especially the second one, which was no easy feat.

E.K.: The guy is great at arranging his numbers so that they 1) fit his style and 2) sound contemporary, just like you pointed out. Plus, he just sings well pretty much every week. Brooke White, on the other hand, was hit and miss this week...or rather, miss and hit, because the first one, "I'm A Believer", was ridiculous. The emotion on that one was so fake, which bothers me, Brooke Fan that I am. There's no way that song should ever be considered by a Top 5 contestant, ever. However, with her second song, "I Am, I Said", she showed her true colors, and that's all I can ask for. I liked how when Simon said her first song was "a nightmare", she immediately piped up, "No! No, no, no," smiling all the while. She's still just a genuine performer who isn't taking this thing so seriously that she'd cry if she got voted out, and that part of her I like the most.

Smooth: The first song was truly awful. It was a bad fit for her voice and her performance was weird. Second one was standard-issue Brooke. As for David Archuleta, could you pick two more ridiculous and obvious songs? There is absolutely NO WAY that those songs don't sound karaoke. He didn't even sound that great anyway, and we got a lot of stoic Muppet-face as usual.

E.K.: His problem, to my ears, is his youth, because although he sang well, I can't take those versions of those songs ("Sweet Caroline" and "America") and not think they resembled something we'd see on the Mickey Mouse Club. It was Cheese Ball all the way, and he didn't connect with me. Of course, I am not a shrieking 13-year-old girl, which is his target demographic and which he hit a bulls-eye on of course.

Smooth: As for Syesha Mercado, the first song was meh; good, but very forgettable. I liked the second one more. She sounded good again. Good energy, almost a bit over the top at times but fun overall. Simon says he thinks she's in danger -- maybe he's actually trying to help boost her vote count?

E.K.: I too was surprised by his comments. She's been getting more impressive as the weeks go on. I remember what I said weeks ago: "Tune in next week when we find out who will make the Top 11! Not so fast, Syesha!" And am wondering, how did she overcome her blandness so fast and deliciously? And I say "deliciously" because she looked fantastic this week. (Side note: About those extensions, girls? Here's a clue: Just grow your hair out already. That's when you look the best!) Now...can we talk about Paula for a second? What the hell?

Smooth: She is seriously batshit crazy. Here's what happened: Since there were two songs for each singer, they decided to streamline the show a bit and wait until all five contestants were done with their first number before commenting. They brought them all out after Syesha was done with her first song, and then the judges commented on all of them briefly, just like we're doing now. Paula addressed Jason, commenting on his first song, and then talked about his second song, which left her "empty", even though -- this is precious -- it hadn't occurred yet.. I am assuming she was looking at notes from dress rehearsal, but that was embarrassing as hell.

E.K.: But my question is this: She said Jason's second -- and non-existent to that point -- song wasn't good, but then after she had been told he hadn't sung twice yet, she sputtered, "You know what? I'm looking at--it's your notes, David [Cook]. You were fantastic." Which was weird, because if she had been looking at her notes on David Cook, she wouldn't have said the performance left her empty. I guess my question is: Why is she still allowed to be a judge on this show?

Smooth: It was one of those "WTF?" moments you might have with your friends when you say something out of left field, except it was on national TV, and she didn't cover for it very well.

E.K.: No, she's a mess. Drunk? On medication? An idiot? I don't know, but I do know that she is the Joe Morgan of American Idol analyzing.

Smooth: Anyway, my bottom two is Jason and Brooke, and Brooke will be voted out. Last week I was way off on her but I really don't think she'll last another week.

E.K.: Something tells me Brooke and Syesha are the bottom two tonight, and that Syesha is gone. I really do. As good as she is, she just isn't as memorable as Brooke, or any of the others. Maybe Simon was right. But Jason is also a good guess. We shall see in about an hour!

Smooth: Well, going in I thought this was the Worst Theme Ever. Seriously, Andrew Lloyd Webber has written some well known stuff for Broadway, but nothing in his repertoire is at all relevant to what any of these kids would do if they cut an album.

E.K.: No kidding. The themes this season have just completely sucked. Has anyone gotten to do an actual relevant non-Mariah Carey song from this decade? Seriously, off-hand, I can't think of one.

Smooth: Plus, he is seriously freaky looking. Yikes. We started with Syesha Mercado's meet 'n' greet with ALW. She ridiculously asked if she should be animated, and he had her do an "un-animated" version of "One Rock & Roll Too Many" (from Starlight Express, apparently) in which she intentionally looked around nervously while not moving a muscle in her body, like ALW was going to say "Actually, that looks awesome! Do that on stage!" Anyway, the song started and Syesha looks really good, with a kind of retro haircut and a very slinky dress. She was off the beat at the start and has a few flat/weak moments with her voice, but for the most part she sounds good, as usual. She was definitely having a good time with it, and hamming it up as much as her "acting" background will allow. The judges say she could do well on Broadway and I have to agree. It was more entertaining than her usual ballads.

E.K.: I thought it was pretty good as well. She started singing maybe a note-and-a-half too soon and I wondered if she'd catch on, and fortunately she did. (This would turn out to not be the worst beginning to a performance on Tuesday night. More on the Brooke-tastrophe later.) Syesha had a lot of fun with it, and even though she did hit a few pitchy spots, she proved that she is comfortable in this genre. It was overall nice work.

Smooth: Next was Jason Castro with "Memory" from Cats. Said Jason: "Uh, I didn't even know a cat was singing it." Good God, man. ALW seemed worried about how the performance will go. Aaaaand rightly so. It started off kind of OK, with the normal laid back Castro take, but it quickly gets too low in his register. Then it's almost too high. It's always bad, though. He just doesn't have the vocal chops to pull this song off, but that would be a problem for him with almost any Broadway material. It's super-boring and not good. Paula says it sounded like a pop ballad, which it really, really didn't.

E.K.: Paula's insane. Anyway, this was indeed a low point for Castro. Wrong song, spotty singing, etc. Unlike Syesha, Jason proved he was completely out of his element here. Not only was he obviously not comfortable, he just doesn't have the Broadway-tune persona to pull this thing off. Tough break for him this week.

Smooth: Brooke sang "You Must Love Me" from Evita. ALW awesomely said Brooke has "no clue" what the song is about and that she should probably think about the lyrics a little bit. Brooke screwed up the lyrics at the start, and restarted the whole band.

E.K.: It was at this point when I paused it, shuddered, and said, "Oh, no. Oh, no," over and over, just because, like Archuleta did a few weeks back, once a singer messes up that bad, it's just a pain to watch the rest of the performance because I'm always thinking the singer is bound to screw up again. Interesting choice to stop the song and ask for a do-over. I thought that given the circumstances, I would probably have done the same thing (as Simon said post-song) and hope I remembered the words the next time around. Fortunately she did, but unfortunately, it just was not going to be her night after that. I don't think a full recovery can be made once that happens.

Smooth: I'm just not going to say that's OK here. We're close to the end, and these singers should be pretty professional. She had one song to sing. Something like that is unlikely to happen at a concert, and it wouldn't happen in Broadway no matter what. Anyway, I think it did shake her a bit, because her voice is even more quavering and weak than usual. Like Jason, she doesn't have the voice for Broadway. Even Paula has a hard time coming up with positive comments. She is definitely feeling sheepish about the whole thing afterward, and she looks scared and sad, and I feel bad for her.

E.K.: I think the only reason she could ever get away with such a gaffe is that she's so genuine in her performing that she is easily forgiveable. Brooke could maybe bludgeon my entire family with a Louisville Slugger, smile and say, "I'm sorry, it just wasn't my night," and I might be able to forgive her. If she were at all a poseur, she'd lose all credibility.

Smooth: David Archuleta did "Think of Me" from Phantom of the Opera, and is apparently changing it up. I have no idea.

E.K.: I'm surprised I even know what Phantom of the Opera is.

Smooth: ALW says the song --

E.K.: Dude, it's "A-Web." Don't you know anything about the hip teenies today?

Smooth: I shall punch you. The song was written for a "diva" and he can't imagine a "boy" singing it. Especially an exceedingly masculine, highly sexual creature like David, am I right? Barf. Oh, Ryan has some tweens come up and hug David before he starts singing which is pointless and stupid. The song is... fine. It's exactly what I'd expect of David. It's fairly boring, with a good vocal, and lots of emoting and loud breathing. Randy and Paula LOVE it, but Simon thankfully points out that it was nothing special.

E.K.: I have had it up to my bald head with this "Awww, he's such a cutie!" nonsense. And how fake was that bring-the-girls-on-stage-for-a-hug crap? David sang it well, I thought, but it sounded like he messed up some lyrics (but how would I know? I guess since he mumbled a line or two). I think he got away with whatever it was, and I am thinking there is no way he'll be voted out. As Ryan called out David's voting phone number, David, as is custom, stood there with a dopey smile on his face. He looks like a freaking Muppet.

Smooth: ALW forced Carly to throw away her original ballad song choice and do "Superstar" from Jesus Christ Superstar. He says the new choice fits her voice a lot better, and weirdly keeps referring to her "Irish eyes having it." Anyway, ALW is right, as Carly sounds good. She freaking rocks out, looking way happier than usual, although she manages to throw some angry faces in there too. She does get a lyric wrong at the beginning (singing "Superstar" while the backup singers sing "Jesus Christ"). As Simon later points out, it's kind of yelly, but it still sounds good; Broadway stuff really rewards vocal strength like Carly's. This is her best performance in quite a while. I'm not sure if it will save her from the bottom three, but I was entertained and -- like Syesha -- I'm glad she didn't just do another ballad.

E.K.: I thought it was same-old, same-old from Carly. Way too yelly, and she just barely missed those high notes (at least to my ears). She looks very good in the dress, though, and I must salute the costumers; they're finally putting her in something that accentuates her beauty instead of detract from it. I did catch her messing up the lyrics, too, I think more than once. But the dress was nice. Time's winding down, and we're still missing the showstopping performance I thought Carly would have given by now. She still looked great, though. She is disappointing me. Did I mention the dress?

Smooth: Shut it. David Cook apparently is very familiar with musical theater, and it seemed like ALW wanted to get very familiar with him, wink wink.

E.K.: Nudge nudge. Know what I mean?

Smooth: Say no more! He did another well-known song, "Music of the Night" from Phantom of the Opera. David did a surprisingly straightforward rendition.

E.K.: I wouldn't know.

Smooth: He did put a slight rock edge on it, but he enunciated and phrased it like a Broadway singer would. It sounded pretty good; David's vocals have always been fairly strong and he showed off some range here. I was still bored by it, though, and it was a rather cheesy choice of song, but once again both of those are byproducts of the theme. The girls squee uncontrollably.

E.K.: Yeah, at the start, I thought, oh my, he's definitely overdoing it with the e-nun-ci-a-ting. But a few seconds later, the obvious hit me: That's exactly how a Broadway song is supposed to sound! And from then on, it totally worked for me, and he actually rocked it out, and I liked it, and there's absolutely no way I will ever be caught dead at an Andrew Lloyd Webber show.

Smooth: Yeah, couple of decent performances in there, but that theme sucked.

E.K.: It sucked. Can we please have a Songs-That-Are-Younger-Than-The-Contestants week?

Smooth: So I'm thinking Brooke, Jason and Carly are the bottom three, with Brooke voted out.

E.K.: Yeah, I might have to do one of those stupid candlelight vigil things, because I think Brooke is out tonight. Fare thee well, fine young maiden. I think Syesha and Jason will round out the bottom three. Let's watch tonight!

Smooth: Okay!

E.K.: I'll bring the popcorn!

Smooth: No! Stay home!

E.K.: I don't know who you are anymore.

E.K.: Well, last night we said goodbye to the first singer who became a favorite of mine this year, Kristy Lee Cook. I called her a "refreshing lime wedge" in my first write-up of the season, if only because on that audition show she followed a guy who sang badly like a foul shot of tequila. At times Kristy displayed a nice voice, but then she had her bad weeks, and now she gets voted off right when she's picking up momentum. Oh well. She's still cute, and she'll probably be able to get a country record released sometime soon. Now, in the words of Casey Kasem, on with the countdown. And once again here is E.K. Nation's Senior American Idol Correspondent Smooth to get us rolling, what with the week's performances forthwith notwithstanding heretofore post haste tout de suite:

Smooth: Well, hello, once again! First we had David Archuleta. Even though this was one of his better performances in the last few weeks, I'm not loving it, and I think I'm getting biased against him. He is a pretty good (but not GREAT) singer who is mostly devoid of personality and overperforms every time he's on stage. Plus, he picks some boring songs. It was overall a solid vocal, but when he tried to hit a high note (per Mariah's suggestion) he missed it initially, and it sounded bad. I don't understand the fawning over him...is it just because he's young?

E.K.: Nope.

Smooth: Is it the fact that the gals think he's cute?

E.K.: Bingo.

Smooth: I wouldn't be angry if he wins or anything, but I feel like he is being way over-pimped by the judges, and it's annoying.

E.K.: I agree that he is picking some boring songs. Trouble with this week, at least for me, is that I've never found Mariah Carey's songs to be all that interesting. Her videos, on the other hand...

Smooth: Mmmmm...Mariah Carey videos.

E.K.: Mmmmmm.

Smooth: Mmmmmmmmmmm.

E.K.: Mmmmmmm-hmmmmmmmm.

Smooth: Mmmmmmmmmm.

(long pause)

E.K.: Wait, what?

Smooth: We were talking about Mariah Carey videos.

E.K.: Mmmmmmmmmm.

Smooth: Oh, jeezly crow. We were talking, actually, about David Archuleta.

E.K.: Oh yeah. Okay, so I think he's been a pretty solid singer most of the time, save for a couple really bad weeks. And yes, the girls love him 'cause they think he's cute and all that. And now with Michael Johns out of the way, he's a threat to win it. I thought this week was one of his better performances. But there's just something about him that's missing when considering whether he deserves to win. He's just not on a par with other winners.

Smooth: Moving on to Carly Smithson...Nice, Ryan, take up Carly's screen time talking about how much you miss Michael Johns. Another predictable song choice ("Without You"). I still don't understand why Carly exhibits so much more personality off stage than on it. Here's a shocker: She sounded very good but looked very angry. She's just okay once again. I just don't see her breaking through and really turning into an entertainer. This is one of the more well-known songs of the night, not sure if that hurts or helps here, really.

E.K.: She definitely needs to bring the charm she has offstage with her on to the stage during her performancers. And yeah, it was the same old thing: She just seemed angry while singing again. Only this time, I thought she strained way too much to hit those high notes. I watched this episode via YouTube so I'm not sure if the audio quality was worthy, but she just sounded like those higher notes were just out of her range and she missed them. I could sense that she was thinking, "Wait, I'm not going to hit these notes, so how can I make it sound like I planned to do something else?" I'm no longer sold on Carly. If she doesn't bust out with a Fantasia-"Summertime"-level performance soon, she'll be close to gone. I liked the top she had on, though. The costumers finally got a clue.

Smooth: I knew Syesha Mercado would be the closest to a "Mariah Carey" style, and it just doesn't help her. It's a very good vocal, but although Mariah Carey is a crazy ho, she can SING. Syesha's just not going to live up to that. She has tackled other tough songs lately and pulled through, so maybe she'll be OK, but in the end, it wasn't that memorable.

E.K.: For me, not only was it not memorable, it was annoying. My god, it seemed like the last third of the song consisted of those ridiculous runs that grate on me like scat does. I hate those things. Sing some words, dammit! Not only that, but of course, she's going to be compared to Mariah, and that never helps. I thought she sang the lyrics rather well, though, and she has definitely surprised me with her staying power. She will in no way win this thing.

Smooth: Well, Brooke White stripped "Hero" down to a piano arrangement. What else could she do, really? She has nowhere near the power in her voice to pull off most Mariah Carey songs. When MC is mentoring her, she basically has to ask Brooke "um... that was the note you were going for, right?" and I LOL'ed. The problem with this performance is that we have seen the exact same thing from Brooke like four times now, and this is not an improvement. It might have been interesting at first, but now it's just boring. I really agree with Randy's assessment that she gradually lost confidence throughout the performance because it got worse and worse towards the end.

E.K.: We've seen all she has to offer, apparently. It's nice and all, and she could probably do a pretty good remake of Tapestry, but it's not enough to win this thing. If it were Truly Genuine and Great Person Idol, she'd win, hands down. They'd have stopped the fight already.

Smooth: Why did every contestant pick a ballad? Mariah's done a lot of uptempo stuff, right?

E.K.: I'm thinking the faster tempo songs aren't the best vehicle to show off singing talent. Then again, I don't really have any Mariah songs burned into my mind to accurately say that. And I'm thinking "Touch My Body" might be too suggestive for the littler viewers.

Smooth: Anyway, it was a good performance. Glad they're not perming her hair anymore. Unlike Syesha, her vocal style is naturally different from MC's and the arrangement is country-fried slightly so she doesn't invoke the comparison at all. It's still pretty boring, though. She was consistent, and factoring in the country fan base, I was thinking she might stick around a few more weeks.

E.K.: I like how they turned it into a country song by just putting in three or four one-measure-long slide guitar riffs. Kinda cheap, actually, but I suppose she had to do something. I'm a bit sad to see her go, but not because of her singing. She's just so damn pretty. And I liked how genuinely excited she was whenever Simon gave her good reviews. She didn't have anything fake going on; what we saw was who she is.

Smooth: After last week's disaster, David Cook got back to doin' what he do. He did an unusual arrangement of "Always Be My Baby" that worked surprisingly well... the strings were used to nice effect, and the song built tension over time, allowing for a rock ending. I would be very interested to learn how much input David has into these arrangements, because if he is doing most of it himself I think he could actually have more talent as a producer than a singer. His vocals are good; I'm just saying that the key to his success has really stemmed from his song choices. Unlike Brooke, he's changing things up each week and it makes each performance more memorable. At this point I think he is the only threat to the coronation of David A., but if Chris Daughtry only managed to finish fourth (albeit in a fairly strong year), can DC really win?

E.K.: I must confess, I had to view this one twice. The first time I wasn't really into it. I thought the notes were a bit low to start out, and the arrangement kind of threw me off. But after I listened to the judges rave about it, I decided to go back and see what it was I apparently missed...and lo and behold, I missed the whole thing. It was damn good after all! Shame on me for letting a comment by Paula -- that it would have been great for a movie soundtrack -- sway me into changing my take. I shall now stand in the corner for twenty minutes.

Smooth: Well, hold on, we just have Jason Castro left to discuss. Once again, there was a torrent of goofy faces. I don't think the vocal is that great; it was a bit shaky and I think a bit flat before he launches into the chorus. From there, it got better. Overall, it's an average-to-good performance for him. Tonight, that's good enough to go through.

E.K.: I said previously that I felt he was kind of going along with this competition as a goof, but Paula said, and I agree, that -- oh, no, I really deserve to stand in a corner now -- he's been growing more confident with each week, and I think that is indeed reflected in his performances. I thought this week was great again. The vocal worked for me a lot better than it did for you, I guess. And the arrangement was great too. I had Carly, David A. and Syesha in my bottom three, for no real reason other than stranger things have happened, and I thought Syesha's time had run out. I was wrong.

Smooth: I had Carly, Syesha and Brooke in my bottom three and Carly being voted out.

E.K.: Well, what do we know, really?

Smooth: Not much, I guess.

E.K.: Here's what we'll do next week. Along with our write-ups, we'll also try to encapsulate a review of each singer's performance by creating an anagram of that person's name. Think it can be done?

Smooth: Uhhh...I'm thinking you might be on your own with that.

E.K.: Okay. The point is "moot. Sh!" (Get it?)

Smooth: (rolls eyes)

Listen. Here's the thing: Whenever I think of American Idol, I always keep it in perspective. It's entertainment and entertainment only. It's not intended to determine, really, who the best singer is. Sometimes the best singer wins, but more often than not he or she does not win. Because this is true, it's not a pivotal thing, societally speaking. It's just a nationally-televised karaoke contest. That's what it is.

Having said that, America, last night you voted out the best singer in the American Idol competition.

Michael Johns didn't need to win American Idol in order to be successful; in fact, I'll guess that his first CD will be the most successful out of all those competitors who actually will put out records in the coming months or years. But come on, America. You chose Syesha and Kristy Lee over Michael? Even David Cook, who at times seemed to be doing his best Michael Johns impression? That's like Charlie Chaplin entering a Charlie Chaplin lookalike contest and not winning (which actually happened once, as legend has it).

American Idol Season 7 without Michael Johns will be like pizza without the crust. It might taste like pizza in the end, but it could fall apart at any time. It's just not strong anymore. Carly, Castro, David A., Brooke, you've got some work ahead of you. Keep me interested.

Smooth: A'ight, since we last visited this fine program, we had a second, much more awful Beatles night, Dolly Parton's face scared the crap out of me, and a few contestants have departed: David H. (never stood a chance), Amanda (didn't even want to be there), Chikezie, and Ramiele (both of whom I liked but had bad weeks). Also, David Cook dropped a few awesome performances, Kristy Lee managed to hang around, our collective time was massively wasted by "viewer questions", and Paula spewed all sorts of crazy. This week we have the loosely defined theme of "inspirational songs"... so that could be just about anything. OK, probably not "Smack My Bitch Up." That might not fit in.

E.K.: I was thinking "It Was A Good Day" by Ice Cube. Y'know, with inspirational messages such as "I didn't even hafta use my A.K." and "Plus, nobody I know got killed in South Central L.A...today was a good day." But I agree, the second Beatles night was just overkill, and I think Michael absolutely nailed his Dolly Parton selection...and I think I'm going to embed it right here just because it's cool.

Smooth: We only had an hour (oh no!) so we quickly jumped into Michael Johns doing Aerosmith's "Dream On". He looked like an idiot in a collared short-sleeve shirt, vest, and a patterned cravat. He sounded pretty good for the most part, although the bulk of the song's not very challenging. He tried to do the screaming falsetto thing at the end and it didn't quite work; very few people would be able to pull that off, and he does OK with it. The performance is standard Johns fare. OMG, Sinbad is in the audience! He is so relevant! Randy and Simon correctly pointed out that he has done quite a few rock songs that don't adequately show off his voice. Michael doesn't seem to care. The audience was going batshit crazy for him, and the girls do seem to like him. Overall, I thought this was good but not spectacular. He's never really blown me away.

E.K.: I don't know, man, cravats, ascots, I think Michael can strangely pull that look off.

Smooth: Man crush!

E.K.: Silence your face. I thought the screaming at the end was totally unnecessary. That's Steven Tyler's take on the song. Doesn't mean Michael has to do it. That didn't work for me. But mostly it was great yet again. He just looks and sounds the part of a professional rock star and as far as I am concerned he is the one to beat. He's the only one who hasn't had a relatively bad week, if my recollections serve me well.

Smooth: Next up was Syesha Mercado, who did "I Believe", the Fantasia song. Immediately, I knew the judges wouldn't love it, and she hasn't learned from doing Whitney songs. I don't quite get it. She's got a very good voice, in fact better than I gave her credit for earlier in the competition, but if she keeps picking these songs the judges will harp on her incessantly. Plus, this song's not terribly memorable. She does go into the whistle register late in the song, which always impresses me when done well. Still a pretty blah performance, though.

E.K.: I hate the whistle register. It's obnoxious. Having said that, the rest of the performance was stellar, especially considering how unmemorable I thought Syesha has been this whole competition. Last week, her take on "I Will Always Love You" was great, too, and her stock has definitely risen. However, and I agree with you, she's always going to be compared to these other superior singers when she performs and it's not going to suit her well. She can handle a song by, say, Faith Hill or whoever, but these top-level singers are too tough to match, particularly when their versions are always going to be in your mind.

Smooth:Next was Jason Castro, who covered a cover of "Somewhere Over the Rainbow". I do like this version, although Jason's ukulele stylings aren't quite as authentic as those of the 700-pound Hawaiian guy he's emulating.

E.K.: I had to look up who it was that did that version. I never would have thought it was, seriously, a 700-pound Hawaiian dude! That's three-and-a-half of me, plus a pineapple or two.

Smooth: It's a very simple arrangement. The show brings in a string section to accompany him, which does nothing but add an unnecessary melodramatic element to the song. Jason makes all kinds of weird faces while he's singing. If I close my eyes I like it a lot better. It's a great song for his voice and his laid-back style. Nice performance.

E.K.: Even though he's doing a copycat version of it, I think this performance, along with "Hallelujah", is his best to date. I'm trying to arrange a potential Final Four in my head, and Jason keeps popping into it. I do agree that the inclusion of the orchestra was a misstep. Stripped bare, it's solid, but with the strings, you're right, it's a bit much.

Smooth: The dead eyes of Kristy Lee Cook scare me. She did a Martina McBride something or other.

E.K.: Yes, a song called "Anyway", which I had never heard. You know, Kristy is regaining the form that she had about her when she first auditioned. Solid, if not spectacular vocals, and fantastic looks. She's had a few off weeks but she's brought it back and suddenly this whole competition is doing tumbleturns. I no longer have any idea right off the bat who the bottom three might be. She's getting better, but it might not be enough.

Smooth: She sounds pretty good and she looks nice. She's still not too charismatic. What else is there to say? She'll probably have a career in country music. But she's not going to win American Idol. David is the next Cook to perform, doing an Our Lady Peace song, and it wasn't even "Clumsy" or "Superman's Dead". Guh? You know what show you're on, right, Dave? This started off terribly. His voice was so nasal and from the back of his throat and just plain awful I honestly was wondering if he was joking at first. He quickly launched into his normal voice but he kept kind of going back to what I assume is his bad OLP impression throughout. The song as arranged is repetitive and weird. Bad song choice, bad vocal, bad performance. Of course, Paula thought it was great. Simon, who is not insane, calls it his worst performance in weeks. I think David will be OK for now, but I don't think he's likable enough to have a few weeks like this in a row.

E.K.: God, this was horrible from the get-go. I am familiar with the song but I don't think I have ever heard it on the radio so I don't know how the viewers and voters will react, but then again, maybe I do, since as I just said, it was a horrible performance and voters will know that no matter whether they are familiar with the song or not. And it really was a bad choice to begin with. It's not an inspirational song at all. "We are all innocent"? Actually, right there, that is wrong, we're not all innocent, and even so, how is that inspirational? Bad, bad week for David. The vote this week might cause him some angst. The voters might be thinking he's a poor-man's Michael Johns and find no need to keep him anymore. He can't afford a bad week when Michael's doing so well. And a quick word about the vote: Are we going to even have a cast-off tonight, what with the Idol Gives Back charity thing going? Last year during the results show of Idol Gives Back week they held over the votes for the following week and eliminated two contestants then. We're probably going to get cheated. I mean, err -- the producers are probably going to have a soft spot in their hearts this week and not feel right about sending anyone away. But we shall see.

Smooth: Carly Smithsonsang Queen's "The Show Must Go On"...lots of Queen this year, oddly, and I'm not just talking about Danny Noriega. Oh, snap!

E.K.: Oh no you di-ehnt.

Smooth: Anyway, Carly was in weird high-waisted pants again, but she looked good otherwise. Her voice sounds good, as usual, although she's all over the place a few times when doing vocal runs. The background singers are a bit loud at times. Simon calls it an "unusual" choice of song, which is true in that it doesn't fit in with some of the other performances tonight, but that's not necessarily her fault. The "theme" is so vague that there's no reason this couldn't be an inspirational song in her eyes. She did look angry, though. She's got to be one of the more disappointing contestants this year, because she has oodles of vocal talent but for whatever reason she just isn't an entertaining performer.

E.K.: I'm starting to tire of her yelly style of singing with that ever present mean look on her face. And the tattoo -- my god, girl, cover that thing up! It's not ugly -- well, yeah, a tat that big usually is -- but more than that, it's just distracting and it just doesn't fit. She's a beautiful girl but she's all covered with paintball splatter and anger, and as Simon noted a week or so ago, she needs to get someone new to dress her. Put her in jeans or something and have her do a happier song. Anyway, as for this week, she's still a good singer but I am thinking we've seen all there is to see. Will it be enough?

Smooth: The Anointed One, David Archuleta, is singing "Angels". He was playing the piano, but there was so much other stuff going on that you couldn't really hear it. The vocal was decent, although I still think he's overrated as a singer. The song's a bit low for him; he's breathy and didn't quite hit a few high notes he goes for. It got better at the end. The judges drooled all over him, but at least Simon points out the vocal wasn't perfect (which earned him a cascade of boos from the audience).

E.K.: As it always does. Simon's usually right and Paula's always batty, but they always applaud her and boo Simon. I thought this was a much better performance than the couple of recent off-weeks he's had, but like you I was wondering why the piano when we couldn't hear it? The "aww, he's so cute" thing is getting old, too. I can't think of what will get him voted off soon. Only teen girls and their moms vote, right? Finally, we had my girl, Brooke White. Siiiiigh.

Smooth: Dude. Stop that. She closed the show with Carole King's "You've Got a Friend", which should be right in her wheelhouse. It started off OK; once again, when Brooke does not have an instrument she kind of tries to overdo things both with her performance and with her voice. She sounds good, just a little bit hoarse and shaky like she always does. The arrangement is nice, with piano and strings coming in at the right times. It's a straightforward rendition and while it doesn't blow my socks off, it's still among the better performances of the night.

E.K.: Well, while she's still my favorite person left, she's not my favorite performer in terms of any wow factor. She sings very adequately but it's nothing to write home about. Simon summed it up best: "Was it original? No. Was it pleasant? Yes. Thank you." If I were a voter, I'd vote for her anyway because she's so lovable.

Smooth: Dude. Stop that. OK, so here's my predicted bottom three: Syesha, Michael, and Carly. And I'm guessing Carly will be voted out tonight.

E.K.: If there is a vote-off, that is. Kristy, Carly and David Cook will be in the bottom three, but that they will not vote anyone off, and that's my official guess. Tune in tonight folks! Brooke White!