Monday, September 15, 2003
FOR FOOTBALL CRIMES
Cedric Wilson was last seen in St. Louis. He stole a victory from 49ers fans. He is also guilty of the crime of not knowing what the hell the situation is, which is fine if you have just awakened from a coma but not if you are on a football field in the closing seconds of a tie game and you need to down the ball so that you can call a timeout and kick a field goal to win a game you will eventually lose if you don't do so.
(Artist's rendering)
FOR FALLING WRONG AND ILLUSTRATING WITH MADDENING PRECISION HOW STUPID THE NFL OVERTIME RULES ARE
Memo to the NFL: Having the outcome of a football game rest on the result of a coin flip is, uhh, a bit silly. Google "Kansas Plan" and see what comes up.
